Something to Complain About --blog from Sheila

Like clockwork, Oliver’s school bus rolls up to the stop at 8:28 a.m. every school day. And like clockwork, his bus driver has something to gripe about.

I don’t know this woman well. In fact, I have never even seen her outside the driver’s seat of the #500. What I do know, is that she’s a complete grouch. She seems to be civil to the children – I’ve never seen her bark at them. She’s just one of those people who seems to have a problem with other drivers (especially other bus drivers), traffic, weather conditions, and basically anything that really doesn’t matter in the whole scheme of things. She always has some sort of complaint to share with me as soon as the bus doors open.

Take yesterday, for example. As the bus pulled up to the stop and Oliver got on, she started in. First came the eye roll. Then she started complaining. This time it was directed towards the school bus driver that had just pulled away from the curb. “Did you see that?” she asked me. “What’s that?” I replied. “The guy puts on his blinkers, but he doesn’t put on his flashers,” she spat. Not being a bus driver myself, the severity of this offense was lost on me. I tried to sympathize, but all I could get out was a shoulder shrug and an, “Oh, yeah?”She shook her head, rolled her eyes again and ironically told me to “Have a good day,” like she always does.

Until now, I’ve always snickered at her behavior under my breath as the bus pulled away. But at this point in my life, she really ticks me off. I admit I am a bit touchy at the moment. Getting a cancer diagnosis brings about a range of emotions: fear, depression, denial and self-pity, to name a few. It also makes one realize just how much some stuff just doesn’t matter. Even if this grave transgression on the part of the other bus driver was forgotten as Oliver’s driver pulled away, she still wasted 6.2 seconds of her life being pissed off about it. What a waste of time!

Other things that are a waste of time: getting annoyed at the computer, denying one’s self pastries, straightening up the kitchen counter several times a day and being annoyed by Seattle’s gray skies. In my opinion, it also doesn’t make sense to complain about your life when you have a job, a home, good friends and family. I see this all too often, and I’ve been guilty of it from time to time myself. I’m not complaining anymore.

Worrying myself about my future health is also a waste of time, so I have decided I am not going to do it anymore. I made a big mistake yesterday and started doing some online research on the characteristics of my particular type of tumor. I didn’t like what I saw, and it made me scared and depressed. As cliché as it sounds, and at the advice of the wise Wendy, I am going to live one day at a time.

Anyone care to join me?